Monday, January 21, 2008

My World And Welcome To It

It's tough to be a werewolf or any other kind of zot these days. You have a job, a mortgage, pay taxes, never run red lights and still humans try to kill you every chance they get. Take us werewolves. Humans refuse to believe we don't consider them a delicacy. Honestly, they don't even taste all that good. A human gets eaten every five blue moons but to hear them tell it, we chow down on them every day. When we do eat them...well, it's like getting shot. They're in the wrong place at the wrong time and there isn't anything else to eat and we're hungry. And that hardly ever happens, even in the cities. About the only time we kill humans is when they're trying to kill us. That goes for all of us zots, not just werewolves.

Now don't go thinking just because we're all in the same boat means we're one big happy family. Far from it. Some of us get along better than others but on the whole...well, we don't. Still, there are times when we're willing to put aside our differences and hang together--like when we go to one of Kurt's raves and P-A-A-RTY! Or when there's a zot pogrom. Then it's all for one and one for all. Who wants to be butchered, for Garm's sake? So in that sense, we kind of look out for each other. You see, there really aren't that many of us. Say, ten to twelve percent of the population worldwide. The only time our numbers rise in proportion is when there's some kind of plague or other scourge that wipes out humans in large numbers. That's because we don't get sick like they do. Like the Black Death. The vampires who remember those times say that in some places, zots actually outnumbered humans. But it never lasts long. Unlike us, humans breed like rabbits. Mmm...rabbits. Delicious.

Who's Kurt, you say? Oh--he's a vampire regent. The Master of Seattle, in fact. He's a sadistic s.o.b. with a really twisted sense of humor, but when he's in a good mood (which is pretty often), he's cool. I think so, anyway. Alpha hates him, but that's another story.

Oops--have to go now. I'm on 'rol duty this week and I'm almost late. Howl at you later!

No comments: